Another anti-bullying assembly? Are kids raising their eyebrows? After these assemblies, does bullying seem to increase?
Another anti-bullying assembly?
Have you heard the above statements about anti-bullying assemblies? Are you one of the people who believes they have no value?
Actually, they can have incredible value if done right. They must present the information in the right way. Not a good idea to lecture students or have Continue reading
I have a story to share with you about just a small number of students who really made a difference in their school.
We had visited the school last year and presented our ‘Stand Up For Respect’ assemblies to all the students. Apparently, some really got the message:
After seeing what they referred to as ‘too much meanness and too much bullying’, five students decided to set up a ‘Stand Up For Respect’ club.
At first, only about a dozen students came to the weekly meetings, but then word started to spread that some cool stuff was happening at the meetings and those students were starting to get noticed. They were speaking up and setting examples that made some positive impact.
After two months, between thirty and forty students were attending the meetings.
They spent their time making posters at some meetings. (The principal let them put the posters up around the school.)
Then they decided to record some commercials that could play on the school announcements.
One student suggested they work on a design for t-shirts, so they starting coming up with different designs. They thought it would make sense to get more people involved, so they put their t-shirt ideas up in the front hall of the school and let everybody vote on their favourite. Then there would be a draw, and one of the voters would win a ‘Stand Up For Respect’ t-shirt.
One week the students were able to get permission to have their meeting in the school computer lab, and they did research on-line. They found videos about showing respect and they decided to ask if they could show some at a school assembly. They had other ideas for the assembly as well. They thought it would be cool to do a skit about stopping bullying by being respectful and standing up against bullying.
They knew that a lot of kids in their school liked music, so they decided to make up some songs about respect.
More and more ideas came together and they thought they could do the assembly for students and maybe do another one at night for parents and kids.
The ‘Stand Up For Respect’ meetings had to start happening in the gym, because more than 130 students were coming on a regular basis, along with seven or eight teachers who were helping out.
They started a contest which each class could participate in called Respect Elect (ric).
Classes could think of a way to decorate their door on the topic of respect, but they had to use bright electric colours. Then the ‘Stand Up For Respect’ club would ‘elect’ the door they thought had the most impact. A picture was taken of every door and the pictures were put on the school website. The winning class got a pizza party. (The local pizza restaurant donated the pizza!)
Parents phoned the school and talked about how impressed they were that the school was being so active to encourage respect.
Just a little story about one school community that really got on board to make some great changes.
Bruce Langford is an anti-bullying advocate who presents bullying prevention assemblies and keynote addresses.
Education Subsidies are available to assist with the costs of bullying prevention programs which can be featured in your school. Parent Council groups in Ontario often have education subsidies available to them in the form of parent reaching out grants, otherwise known as PRO Grants. Pro Grants can be used for purposes that benefit the whole school and particularly parents. What could be more beneficial to parents in the school, than events and activities to help them learn how to deal with bullying that may involve their children? Schools today teach children how to deal with bullying and most schools feature programs, activities, and curriculum-based learning all geared toward teaching children bullying reduction strategies. Up to now, one of the missing links has often been the parent piece. Parents need to be on the same page as children when it comes to bullying prevention. What are some of the things parents need to know?
1/ Cyber-bullying guidance
2/ How to be proactive & prevent bullying
3/ How to guide children in case bullying incidents occur
Cyber-bullying guidance:
When we present our parent programs in schools, one of the first things we point out is related to internet safety. Parents need to be aware that the computer at home should be located in a central place where everyone goes like the kitchen or family room. Young children should grow up with the idea that Internet usage should be open, and freely shared with each other. It should not be a secretive activity. Another thing we point out is how to provide guidance to children if they do run into a problem online. We need to help our children remain open and trusting, so that if something happens online which is negative, they will share it with us as parents. Keeping communication as open as possible when he children are young is a great first step to helping them when they are older.
How to be proactive and prevent bullying:
Teach your children to walk with confidence. Help your child build strong self-esteem so that they will be sending the message to others, that they are not available as a bullying target. Teach your children to report bullying. Help your children understand that after school it is important to share what has happened during the days’ events. If children get used to sharing their daily activities with family when they are young, there is a much higher chance that they will continue to feel free to share when they are older. Studies have shown that problems occur in children who try to keep all of their frustrations inside.
How to guide children in case of bullying incidents:
If a bullying incident happens, step in immediately to stop the behavior from continuing. Be clear about the facts and understand the difference being telling and tattling. Consult with the teacher, vice-principal or principal. Remain calm, keep an open mind and be discreet. If things don’t improve, meet with the principal again and make a written plan. Be sure to contact police if a bullying incident involves criminal behavior such as sexual assault or the use of a weapon. Check with your school to see if education subsidies have been used to sponsor parent workshops on bullying prevention.
Pro Grants are worthwhile education subsidies that have made many anti-bullying activities a reality in Ontario schools. Parents have told us on numerous occasions that they have benefited from workshops and bullying prevention seminars such as our ‘Stand Up – Keep Your Kids’ evening session.
Bruce Langford presents anti-bullying sessions in schools and workplaces to counter bullying and increase respect
www.standupnow.ca.
I just talked to a 10-year-old boy who told me he is immune to mean comments, teasing and also bullying.
I asked him to explain.
He told me that he just doesn’t let the comment or teasing register in his brain. He just ignores it. He said it is just a natural thing and it isn’t even hard to do.
I asked him, “how long have you had this ability?”
Him: “About one and a half or two years.”
Me: Do you realize that this might mean that you will never be bullied because you will never think of meanness as bullying?
Him: “Yes, I realize that. I think that’s a really good thing.”
Me: “How does this make you feel now that you know that you have this ability?”
Him: “I think it is kind of a super-hero-like power really.”
Me: Yes, I can see that it might be.
Him: Just the other day some kids were saying some mean stuff to me and I didn’t even care.
Me: Do you think they were trying to bully you?
Him: Maybe, but I’m not sure. They just stopped because I didn’t give them a reaction.
Me: Do you think there are very many other people with this power you are describing?
Him: I don’t know anyone else.
Me: Do you think other people could develop this power, or is it only reserved for certain people?
Him: I think there are a few people that could do it, but I think most people can’t.
Me: What do you think a bully would do if they knew you had this super-power?
Him: Leave me alone.
Me: Do you think you have any other super powers?
Him: (Thoughtfully) I’m not sure, maybe.
I have never talked to someone who described themselves as being immune to mean remarks and bullying before. I think this is quite interesting. If you have any comments, I would be pleased if you would share them in the comment box. Thanks.
Bruce Langford, Anti-bullying advocate and school presenter www.standupnow.ca
905-233-2102
“It gets better. It seems hard, you know, I think being different is always gonna be a tough climb. There’s always gonna be people that are scared of it. But at the end of the day you give those bullies, those people, that are so ignorant, if you give them the power to affect you, you’re letting them win. And they don’t deserve that. What you’re doing by being yourself is you’re keeping it real, and you’re being really brave.”
― Adam Lambert
“When people see you’re happy doing what you’re doing, it sort of takes the power away from them to tease you about it.”
― Wendy Mass, Every Soul A Star
“With ignorance comes fear- from fear comes bigotry. Education is the key to acceptance.”
― Kathleen Patel, The Bullying Epidemic-the guide to arm you for the fight
Bruce Langford , anti-bullying advocate and speaker www.brucelangford.ca
Recently I noticed that The Hunger Games has received a PG-13 rating in United States while the new movie, Bully has been rated R for language. I’d like your opinion on those ratings. (U.S. ratings) Shouldn’t a movie that teaches about the reality of the bullying epidemic in our country’s schools be available for our youth to see? Some say The Hunger Games should be rated R.
I have included a teenage girl’s review of The Hunger Games below. Let me know what you think.
THE HUNGER GAMES REVIEW
I consider myself a bit of an expert on the Hunger Games because I have actually read the series four times. I first read them just as they were coming out, waiting many months for each book. I loved the hunger games because the characters were very real. The way Katniss dealt with things was not glorified, it was honest. I think Katniss Everdeen, Peeta Mellark, Haymitch Abernathy, Cinna, Finnick Odair, President Snow, Primrose Everdeen, Gale Hawthorne and the other characters really stood out to me in that they each had something completely different about them that added to the story. I have always liked futuristic novels, and this series was full of constant suspense and adventures that made it impossible to stop reading.
I think that someone could benefit from reading The Hunger Games by learning how corrupt society can become if we let it. The world has always been full of sin and people should know that it is real and that people can do sadistic and extreme things for power and control. This is represented in the Capital’s domination of the other districts. Throughout the Hunger Games series, however, the reader sees that no matter how strong the Capital appears to be, there are always “chinks in the armour” and opportunities to rebel. This will never happen, though, if no one has the courage and determination to fight.
There is a lot of controversy surrounding the Hunger Games series as the movie comes out, and some are saying the themes in this series are evil. I do not believe that this is true at all. Yes there is violence and death throughout the books, but most fantasy novels feature this (Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, any series, really). The important thing to remember is that these are not children’s books. The Hunger Games books were meant for young adults and should be treated and viewed accordingly. This books do not condone violence, it fights against it.
In my opinion children under the age of 14 should not be allowed to read The Hunger Games. It is not because they are severely inappropriate; it is because although the books really have nothing the kids don’t see in video games, I do not see a child clearly grasping the point of the series. The corruption, romance and rebellion can be much better understood by an older reader as there are some very complicated factors in the novels.
I do not think The Hunger Games series should be made into a movie because many main points and details will be mixed, diluting the series. In my opinion, don’t see the movie, read the books!
Alyssa Jeavons, Student Lord Dorchester Secondary School, Dorchester Ontario Canada Thames Valley District School Board (TVDSB)
Bruce Langford, anti-bullying advocate and school presenter www.standupforrespect.com
A 10-year old girl in Belleville Ontario is taking a stand against bullying at her school. She says verbal and physical attacks toward her have been ongoing and she has had enough. She wrote a letter explaining details about the bullying she has been experiencing. She says she spends recess in the kindergarten room because nobody will play with her, and explains that she feels alienated and dejected. Her mother believes that the school staff is not protecting her daughter.
These are certainly serious allegations. Although I don’t know all the details surrounding the situation, I have a few suggestions to hopefully calm the waters.
1. I encourage the girl’s parents to set up a meeting with the teacher. Have a list of concerns to address and suggested outcomes. Take notes. Insist on a specific plan of action.
2. After 5 days, re-evaluate the situation. Has the bullying stopped? Has the situation improved? If not, set up a meeting with the principal and make a written plan. Set a date for a follow-up meeting to talk about whether or not things have improved. No child should feel unsafe at school.
3. Ask to see the bullying prevention action plan set out by the school. Ask what initiatives have been put into place to encourage respect and reduce bullying. Insist that you are looking out for the well-being of your child.
Do not give up. Continue to connect with the teacher or administrators to carry out the plan of action. If the plan of action is not working, insist on an alternative. Be aware of the Hasting and Prince Edward District School Board’s commitment to providing caring, safe, respectful and inclusive learning environments for all students. Do your best to remain calm and professional, yet strong with your assertions that your child be provided with the caring, safe and respectful environment referred to by the school board.
I will be most interested in the outcome of this situation and am optimistic it will come to a positive conclusion for all involved.
Bruce Langford provides bullying prevention programs for schools. www.brucelangford.ca
St. Patrick’s Day 2012 is upon us so I decided to google Irish Bullying tips.
What I learned was shocking.
25 per cent of Irish students in Irish secondary schools are bullied according to the website bully4u dot ie. One in four or 175,000 youth in Irish high schools are victims of bullying. The website states: “the evolution of modern communication technologies combined with the increasing integration of our multicultural society has led to such new dynamics as cyberbullying and racist bullying in addition to the more traditional forms.”
The site goes on to encourage adult intervention in bullying incidents. It tells us that it is important for adults to let students know that aggressive behaviour is inappropriate. “Whether you are a bystander, parent or schoolteacher, there are steps you can take to ensure that children are kept safe and that their dignity is respected.”
As we celebrate St. Patrick’s day around the world, make a vow to ‘Stand Up Against Bullying’ and make a difference by empowering yourself and others to act against bullying behaviour.
Bruce Langford is an international speaker and anti-bullying advocate
www.BruceLangford.ca www.StandUpAgainstBullying.com
Talk it out, talk it out, talk it out!
If you are being bullied, don’t keep it all inside you. You can talk it out with the person who is making life tough for you – as long as you do it in a non-confrontational way. Make sure you don’t sound threatening, and don’t display anger or frustration. Just stay cool, and casually talk it out with them.
If you are experiencing bullying on a regular basis, find someone you can talk to; find a trusted friend or adult; find a teacher or councilor. Talk out a situation that is bothering you and it can make all the difference in how quickly you are able to resolve the conflict.
Don’t have anyone to talk to?
Talk to yourself or your pet. If you don’t have anyone to talk to, call ‘KidsHelpPhone’ at 1-800-668-6868. You can also jot down your thoughts in a journal. This can really help you work through your problems. Just remember, keeping anger and frustration locked inside can eventually cause problems.
Talk it out in the most safe and confidential way possible.
Stand Up Now Productions –LiveSchoolShows about Bullying & Conflict Resolution with teacher/presenter Bruce Langford.
Parents of children with emotional problems face extra challenges when dealing with bullying. Extra care must be taken that adults in these situations are not overly harsh in their discipline and that they maintain complete control of their emotions. Mom, Dad and any other care givers should always make sure to keep tempers in check, otherwise the adult-child relationship can become strained very quickly. Consistency is one of the most important factors when dealing with children and this cannot be emphasized too much with children who have emotional problems.
Entertaining, musical assemblies and workshops for children to help beat bullying in schools –
Contact Stand Up Now Productions at:
www.brucelangford.ca or 1-800-901-8831