Category Archives: Bullying Advice

Was Sylvester Stallone bullied and is his success due to his ability to face adversity?

Sylvester Stallone

Sylvester Stallone

As a kid living in Queens, New York, Sylvester Stallone didn’t always get along well in school. He was expelled from 14 schools and eventually his mother ended up getting him into a U.S. college in Switzerland.

Before that though, Sylvester was bullied. So much so that he decided to build his body so he would have the upper hand over any bully who would decide to take him on. He had one big problem. He and his family didn’t have the money to buy weights and body building equipment, so he mustered up some auto parts from the local wreckers and used some cinderblocks attached to a pole to gradually build up those legendary biceps.

It is Sylvester’s belief that you should face your fears head on and beat them by dealing with them directly.

Playing the character Rocky Balboa, Sylvester dealt with his fear of heights by filming the movie Cliffhanger in the Dolomite mountains. He faced his claustrophobia by Continue reading

WebCams for Internet safety at school and home – 5 Child Centred Tips

4 Types of WebCams

4 Types of WebCams

WebCams can be a convenient, fun way to communicate with others.

What exactly is a WebCam?

Answer, a WebCam is a video camera that is attached to or built into a computer.

Most laptops now come with preinstalled WebCams. WebCams can be added to a computer easily and at relatively low cost.

In many cases a WebCam can be purchased for under $50 and immediately plugged directly into the computer. After quickly installing the software, the WebCam can be up and running in minutes.

Many kids are used to sharing their lives with the world through instant messaging, Facebook, other social networking sites, and even emails. WebCams are a tool which kids can use to give the online world a birdseye view of their lives, wherever they may happen to be. This can create a whole new degree of risk that parents and teachers must be aware of.

The images from a WebCam can be sent directly to the Internet. The images can be still photos, a whole series of images, or even video.

WebCams can be used to videoconference with other WebCam users, or the user can post a link to their WebCam on one of the many WebCam sites on the Internet. Anyone who visits the site can then view the images which have been uploaded from your WebCam.

Children can inadvertently post their WebCam address without realizing that other people can log into it. Even users who do not post their WebCams on one of these sites could find their private life being invaded.

Each WebCam has a web address that can be found by search engines who can then post that address on their listings. A WebCam usually has a password, but some users do not change the default password or the password is very, very easy to guess. There are also programs written which are actually viruses (trojan horse programs) which allow hackers to activate a WebCam without the knowledge of the user.

It is important to be aware that there are specific sites set up on the Internet which are designed for people to randomly chat using video through WebCams. Even though some of these sites are age restricted, of course children are known to have logged in. Without going into detail, you can only imagine the kinds of images which are sometimes revealed.

Here are Five WebCam safeguards:

1/ Cover up with tape, or unplug your WebCam when you are not using it.

2/ Never keep a computer with a WebCam in a child’s bedroom.

3/ Teach children that WebCams can be an invasion of privacy.

4/ Keep open communication with your children regarding webcams, instant messaging and social media sites like Facebook.

5/ Be sure your children understand never to respond to on-line messages from strangers.

With correct guidance and supervision, WebCams can be a safe and fun way to communicate with others.

Bruce Langford is an anti-bullying advocate who offers presentations to schools and businesses on bullying, cyberbullying and respect. www.standupnow.ca

 

 

 

Hamilton Parent Anti-bullying event sponsored by Ontario’s PRO Grants

As an anti-bullying week event we visited Sir Wilfrid Laurier public school in Hamilton on November 19, 2012 to present a parent/child presentation called ‘Stand up – Keep Your Kids’.

Parent Council Representative Hamilton

Dayna Liddle, Parent Council Rep Sir Wilfrid Laurier PS

We had a great audience of receptive parents and children who were eager to learn more about bullying prevention. A group of enthusiastic children arrived early to practice role-plays, which they did with sincere conviction. Parent Council representative, Dayna Liddle, was one of the parents in charge of arranging and overseeing the event. Dayna is obviously adamant about bullying prevention.

We talked about a number of concepts which parents can use to help safeguard their children at home, school, and in their communities. Here is an overview of three strategies we discussed.

Confidence:
The energy a human being exudes often comes across as being positive or negative. It is important to ensure that our children are sending positive vibrations to the world, as in my opinion,  this positive energy will also attract positive energy. As parents, it is important to encourage our children to walk with confidence and show confidence in the way they carry themselves. If we are constantly criticizing our children or finding fault with the way they do things, they will develop a low self-esteem that will begin to be apparent wherever they go. Instead, it is important to lift up our children, encourage them, look for the positive, and help them to understand that they are valued individuals who can make a decided difference with their friends or in their community. I strongly believe children who carry themselves in a positive manner, will be targeted less often in bullying situations.

As a parent myself, I understand that it is my job to direct my son if he makes a mistake or does not follow directions. I know I need to be firm and definite about my expectations, however, it is vital that I also help to build up his self-esteem on a continuous basis.

Be Aware of your Child’s Online activity:
When police officers do presentations about cyber bullying, one of the things they talk about is making sure that the computer is in a central place in your home. I also emphasize this very same idea. The computer should not be located at the back of your family room, the corner of your basement or in your child’s bedroom if  it is connected to the Internet. Make sure the computer is in a central place like the kitchen or family room where everyone goes. As an adult we are all responsible for making sure we know exactly what our children are doing online. This includes games, research, online chatting, and social media websites such as Facebook or twitter.

be safe on-line

Be aware of what your children are doing on-line

Cell phones, video, and YouTube:
Many parents are concerned about their child’s safety, and rightly so. As an effort to keep our children safe many of us provide our children with cell phones. However cell phones usually have many capabilities including cameras and video cameras and GPS. These functions while being very useful can also complicate life and provide interesting tools for would be cyber bullies. If a fight breaks out at your child’s school, someone is likely to pull out a cell phone and start videotaping the event. We all know that it is popular to upload these kinds of videos to YouTube or similar sites. Videos such as this often get a high number of hits and it can be a real perk for a student who is trying to get attention. Also what many parents don’t realize is that YouTube will pay users who get a large number of hits on their site. This can also be incentive to upload videos such as I have described.

As a presenter and anti-bullying advocate, I appreciate the fact that this anti-bullying event was made possible by an Ontario government PRO grant. Thanks to everyone who helped organize and support this event at Sir Wilfrid Laurier Public School in Hamilton.

Bruce Langford, anti-bullying advocate and presenter www.standupnow.ca

 

 

Take a determined stand against bullying at school. These students did!

I have a story to share with you about just a small number of students who really made a difference in their school.

We had visited the school last year and presented our ‘Stand Up For Respect’ assemblies to all the students. Apparently, some really got the message:

After seeing what they referred to as ‘too much meanness and too much bullying’,  five students decided to set up a ‘Stand Up For Respect’ club.

At first, only about a dozen students came to the weekly meetings, but then word started to spread that some cool stuff was happening at the meetings and those students were starting to get noticed. They were speaking up and setting examples that made some positive impact.

After two months, between thirty and forty students were attending the meetings.

They spent their time making posters at some meetings. (The principal let them put the posters up around the school.)

Then they decided to record some commercials that could play on the school announcements.

One student suggested they work on a design for t-shirts, so they starting coming up with different designs. They thought it would make sense to get more people involved, so they put their t-shirt ideas up in the front hall of the school and let everybody vote on their favourite. Then there would be a draw, and one of the voters would win a ‘Stand Up For Respect’ t-shirt.

One week the students were able to get permission to have their meeting in the school computer lab, and they did research on-line. They found videos about showing respect and they decided to ask if they could show some at a school assembly. They had other ideas for the assembly as well. They thought it would be cool to do a skit about stopping bullying by being respectful and standing up against bullying.

They knew that a lot of kids in their school liked music, so they decided to make up some songs about respect.

More and more ideas came together and they thought they could do the assembly for students and maybe do another one at night for parents and kids.

The ‘Stand Up For Respect’ meetings had to start happening in the gym, because more than 130 students were coming on a regular basis, along with seven or eight teachers who were helping out.

They started a contest which each class could participate in called Respect Elect (ric).

Classes could think of a way to decorate their door on the topic of respect, but they had to use bright electric colours. Then the ‘Stand Up For Respect’ club would ‘elect’ the door they thought had the most impact. A picture was taken of every door and the pictures were put on the school website. The winning class got a pizza party. (The local pizza restaurant donated the pizza!)

Parents phoned the school and talked about how impressed they were that the school was being so active to encourage respect.

Just a little story about one school community that really got on board to make some great changes.

Bruce Langford is an anti-bullying advocate who presents bullying prevention assemblies and keynote addresses.

www.standupnow.ca

Eliminate Anger with these Five Tips

relaxing waterfall

Let your anger go. Allow peace to replace it.

Anger can often lead to problems which may include violence, bullying or even just frustration. Learn to harness your anger with these 5 basic tips:

  1. Try to figure out why you’re angry. Did somebody say something that really ticked you off? Did someone tease you? Did someone take their anger out on you? If you can answer these questions you may realize you don’t even have a reason to be angry.
  2. Release your anger gradually. Get in touch with your own feelings so you know how you can release your own anger. Go out for a jog. Go for a swim. Workout at the gym. Do something creative. Shoot some hoops. Play the piano. You get the idea. Do something that will help you unwind.
  3. Ask for help. Talk with a friend about your frustrations until you feel better. Spend time with your counselor unloading your frustrations. Sit down and look your web cam in the lens and make a video, talking about how you feel. Watch that video and experience your mood begin to change.
  4. Think about someone you can help. The world is full of people who need a hand. Think of someone who is having a rough time right now. Are they experiencing cyber-bullying or workplace bullying? You can do something to help them. Think of what it is and get to work. This is one of the best ways to beat anger and frustration.
  5. Get totally relaxed. Slow down your thought process and start thinking the most peaceful thoughts you possibly can imagine. Put on a relaxing CD. Close your eyes take deep breaths. Imagine the most relaxing place you could possibly be. Maybe it’s the beach with the sound of gentle waves in the background. It could be a grassy meadow with the breeze blowing through your hair. Feel the tension leave your body. Simply allow your body to completely unwind.

 Bruce Langford, Bullying Prevention Advocate www.standupnow.ca

3 Amazing Quotes which offer Bullying Advice to those being Bullied

“It gets better. It seems hard, you know, I think being different is always gonna be a tough climb. There’s always gonna be people that are scared of it. But at the end of the day you give those bullies, those people, that are so ignorant, if you give them the power to affect you, you’re letting them win. And they don’t deserve that. What you’re doing by being yourself is you’re keeping it real, and you’re being really brave.”
Adam Lambert

“When people see you’re happy doing what you’re doing, it sort of takes the power away from them to tease you about it.”
Wendy Mass, Every Soul A Star

“With ignorance comes fear- from fear comes bigotry. Education is the key to acceptance.”
Kathleen Patel, The Bullying Epidemic-the guide to arm you for the fight

Bruce Langford , anti-bullying advocate and speaker www.brucelangford.ca