Controlling your emotions can minimize bullying situations

hotsummerAs the summer days roll along, it is easy to forget about how many kids get bullied during the summer months. The heat can cause tempers to flair and sometimes anger turns into bullying. After all, bullying is when there is a real or perceived imbalance of power between two (or more) people.

How can we control our tempers when things just tick you off?

Answer: Tune in to your feelings so you can identify oncoming anger before it becomes a full blown case of losing your cool. If you can tell that you are getting testy, then you can take action ahead of time.

1/ Take 10 deep breaths.

2/ Think about a visual scene that is your most relaxing, peaceful place to be (like fishing in a canoe on the river on a warm breezy, summer day).

3/ Have an affirmation ready to repeat in your mind. An affirmation is something you say over and over in your mind.  (Example: In an easy and relaxed manner, in a healthy and positive way, in its own good time. I desire and intend to be calm and peaceful right now).

4/ Change your location

5/ Transition to a different activity

I know that it is valuable to learn to control my emotions and I can help those close to me do the same. For example, just by being a father who stays in control, I am setting an example for my son and his friends. Knowing that I am fully in control of my emotions is a freeing thought.

Obviously, we are all human and it may seem unreasonable to always be aware of emotions at any given time.

I have noticed that I feel a lot happier when I don’t constantly listen to news reports. I watch far less television than I used to, and feel much better as a result. I started that as an experiment. I decided to not watch television for a month. I felt so good that I decided to continue on and so I seldom watch news reports.

A friend of mine told me that she does one thing every day that she completely looks forward to. It might be as simple as relaxing for 5 minutes with a cold drink, or spending a few minutes with her dog on her lap. She says having that simple thing to look forward to every day has a relaxing effect on her whole day.

I think it is important to help children and teens understand how to control their emotions and make sure peace and contentment are a major part of their lives. We can show them by example and also give them a few pointers along the way when the time is right.

Being in control of emotions is a great start to treating other human beings in the best possible way. If you treat other people with respect, you will also feel good about yourself. Feeling good about yourself is really important and can be a step toward making the world a better place.

Bruce Langford is a bullying prevention advocate in Ontario Canada.